Welcoming a child through adoption is a life-changing decision — one that is beautiful, but that also comes with unique challenges. If you’re considering adopting an infant, it’s important to ask not just if you want to adopt, but if you’re truly ready to adopt.
Here are a few key areas to explore as you take this first step.
Emotional Readiness
For many families, adoption comes after years of fertility struggles. If that’s your story, it’s important to ask: Have we had space to grieve what we hoped would be our path to parenthood?
Adoption isn’t a “replacement” for a biological child nor is it a “solution” to infertility. It’s a unique and complex journey that requires its own space emotionally. Children deserve to be welcomed into a home that isn’t carrying unresolved pain. It’s okay (and healthy) to take time to heal before starting this process. Adoption Advocates includes infertility grief resolution in our adoptive parent training.
Adoption also doesn’t end when papers are signed. It’s a lifelong journey for the child, birth family, and adoptive parents. Your child will grow up with questions about their identity, their history, and their story—and they’ll need you to walk beside them with openness and honesty. Is that something you feel you can commit to?
Adoption requires intentionality, patience, and a willingness to grow. There’s no perfect parent, but children deserve parents who are prepared to meet their needs with love, stability, and respect.
Financial Stability
Adoption can be an expensive process, with domestic infant adoption costing up to $60,000. In addition to agency fees, there may be expenses for home studies, training, finalization and travel, if you are chosen by an expectant parent in a different state.
While you don’t need to be wealthy, you do need to be financially stable. Ask yourselves:
- Do we have steady income and manageable debt?
- Do we have savings or a plan to cover adoption costs?
- Are we prepared for ongoing support services (like counseling) if our child needs them?
Raising a child comes with expected costs like diapers and daycare, and unexpected ones like medical bills or therapy. You will need to show an adoption agency that you have the financial means to provide for a child for the next 18 years.
Relationship Health
Infant adoption — especially open adoption — requires teamwork. Prospective adoptive parents will need to navigate emotionally-charged conversations, create agreements with birth parents, and make decisions in real-time as needs arise.
- Do we communicate well under stress?
- Are we on the same page about parenting values and expectations?
- Are we both equally committed to adoption?
If you’re single, do you have a strong support system of trusted friends or family who will walk this journey with you?
Understanding Adoption Ethics
Ethical adoption centers the needs of the child and respects the role of their birth family. That includes being open to contact, preserving their family and cultural history, and speaking with love and honesty about where they came from. Ask yourselves:
- Can we embrace open adoption?
- Are we willing to honor the birth parents’ voice in our child’s story?
- Have we educated ourselves about adoption trauma and how to support our child through it?
Ethical adoption also means researching and choosing an ethical adoption agency.
Practical Preparation
Adoption is complex—and there’s a lot to learn. From home studies and matching processes to post-placement visits and legal finalization, the process can feel overwhelming at first. But you don’t have to figure it out alone.
- Have we attended an adoption orientation or spoken with an agency?
- Have we read books or listened to adoptee voices?
- Do we know what Texas laws say about adoption?
The more informed you are, the more empowered you’ll be to make decisions that are grounded in compassion, respect, and readiness.
Final Thoughts: Readiness Is a Process
If you're reading this and realizing you might not have all the answers yet. That's okay. Readiness isn’t a finish line, it’s a journey. Adoption requires intentionality, patience, and a willingness to grow. There’s no perfect parent, but children deserve parents who are prepared to meet their needs with love, stability, and respect.
At Adoption Advocates, we’re here to walk alongside you. Whether you’re still in the “just thinking about it” stage or ready to take the next step, our team is ready to help you explore if infant adoption is right for you. We invite you to attend one of our free Adoptive Parent Info Sessions to learn more about the process and get answers to your questions.
